What is Unconditional Love really?
We all know dogs come here to teach us unconditional love but what does that really mean and do we actually listen and then follow this through and act on it?
Earlier this year one of my dogs, Susie (pictured above), passed away and she was one of the best teachers of unconditional love that I have ever come across – she embodied it and magnified it beyond description. Since her passing I have been thinking a lot about what she and other dogs have taught me, and still do, about this. Your dog(s) and the dogs you meet will be teaching you about unconditional love too. It is a lesson we learn in all the lives (I believe in reincarnation) we live here on Earth. All dogs show us unconditional love, some by example and some by mirroring us and some by challenging us. So what is it and how do they teach us?
“He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.”
~ Anon
Loving Without Judgement
Judgement is putting a label with a meaning to someone/something or a trait or part of someone/something, one that we label good or bad. To love without judging is to see these parts or the whole and not to put a label loaded with bias on them and accept with compassion an equally ‘good’ or ‘bad’ trait or character. This is very difficult for humans to do in general and it takes a large heart to be able to do this. Judging is something humans are very practiced in. One of my best teachers in this was Rufus, my people-aggressive dog. The less I judged him and the more I accepted him and saw how much he tried the easier it was to feel complete and unconditional love for him. I loved him from the start but loving him all the time and whatever he did became so much easier with his lessons in this and the practice I got. He opened my heart massively. Unconditional love involves refraining from making harsh judgements about others. Instead, focus on understanding their choices and actions, recognising that everyone has their own journey and struggles.
“Our job is to love others without stopping to inquire whether or not they are worthy.”
~ Thomas Merton
Acceptance
Linked to non-judgment is acceptance. Embrace others for who they are, without trying to change them. Acceptance is a cornerstone of unconditional love. Recognise and appreciate their strengths and imperfections, understanding that nobody is perfect. Again Rufus helped me with this, once I learned to accept him and how he was so much strain left our relationship and we made much better progress and had an even better connection than before.
Empathy
Seek to understand the feelings and perspectives of others. Empathy involves putting yourself in their shoes, acknowledging their emotions, and showing compassion. It fosters a deep connection and demonstrates that you care about their well-being. Dogs are masters of empathy, they pick up on our energy and feelings all the time and often are there just to support us, comfort us or show us by mirroring or communicating the best way they can and we can do this with them too. Connect with your heart to theirs and listen to what you receive from them. Dogs teach us just by being there greater heart connections and understanding. The more we connect with them from our heart the more we learn their feelings and state of being.
Forgiveness
Oh, how tough this one can be for us humans! Dogs, however, are masters at this. Whatever we do to them, hopefully unintentionally, they always forgive us and love us. Always. Let go of resentment and forgive mistakes. Unconditional love involves recognising that everyone makes errors, and holding onto grudges can hinder the growth of a relationship. Forgiveness allows for healing for ourselves and moving forward.
Support
Be there for others in both good and challenging times. Offering your support without expecting anything in return is a powerful way to demonstrate unconditional love. Provide encouragement, lend a listening ear, and be a reliable presence in their lives. I started off my career with animals becoming an animal communicator and zoopharmacognosist (self-selection essential oils for healing animals) – both of these having listening as an important part of the process. This showed me how much listening can be empowering and healing in itself and how when this is done with love it brings the connection and healing to a new and higher level.
Self-Love
Lastly but by no means leastly! Unconditional love is not complete without loving ourselves. This includes all of the above points about loving without judgement, acceptance, forgiveness, empathy and support. It is not selfish to love ourselves, on the contrary it is very necessary for our health and well-being. Susie was the queen for showing me to do this and how to do it. She mirrored my own inner beauty and reflected it back to me through her soft loving eyes. Every time I show myself love, compassion and kindness it helps me on all levels. Listen to your dog when she shows you this about yourself or does something to make you slow down and pay attention. Self-love encompasses so much and if you want to learn more about it check out my friend Fiona Elizabeth’s work on Fragrance of Being. Her website and work is all about self-love and she sends out the most wonderful Love Letters by email and are worth signing up to.
Practicing these elements of unconditional love can lead to deeper, more meaningful connections with yourself and those around you and your dogs will thank you.
“My goal in life is to be as good a person as my dog already thinks I am.”
~ Anon
